We all have emotional baggage – or there would be no triggers, right? If we don’t recognize that baggage and its triggers, they continue to run the show even if we are not happy about it.
Know the feeling?
That particular emotional baggage that means you spend time apologizing, or regretting something you said or did, or wishing you hadn’t reacted in that way. Oooh boy!
So what’s holding you in your current pattern? Yes, you were triggered, but what’s the baggage driving that trigger? Where did it come from? How did it get so firmly packed in your bag?
Finding the origin of your triggers and identifying what holds you in particular patterns can be really helpful.
See, once we get all the pieces out where we can see them, they’re easier to work with. Yes, we may end up just chucking it out, or maybe we need to look at the options you have in spite of the triggering. Maybe we can adjust or repurpose them, but we have to know what we’re working with in order to change the pattern. When we face the stuff that drives us, we can alter its effect on us.
Doing it in the moment? Sure, that can be hard. It’s easy when you’re thinking it through and your environment isn’t charged. You can plan all day for making really good choices – until we see that pie or cake or smell the warm bread or whatever they’ve added cinnamon or sage to —
Just thinking of that scent makes your mouth water, doesn’t it?
Or when the food pushers start. Or maybe it’s someone you really don’t want to disappoint, but how do you feel about disappointing yourself? How do you feel about the years of resolutions or Monday starts or the average Wednesday when you haven’t managed to stay on track because you didn’t stand up for yourself? What does it feel like when you know you’ve abandoned your efforts to please someone else?
Yeah, not good, huh?
WHAT IF you could clear out the stuff that muddles your thinking in that moment and creates that feeling? How would that feel? That’s some really good work to do because it will free you, and if you need a little help, don’t hesitate to contact me.
It is possible to stand up for yourself while also being kind and polite – especially when your thinking is clear and focused on the real issue – or cookie – in front of you rather than the emotional stuff creating the conflict.