How’s that belief we talked about last time? Even a smidge of it will do. We can work with a smidge.
I know, sometimes it’s hard to hold onto when it gets hard – when everyone else seems to be able to have what they want, or when you’re making a choice that feels like you’re missing out. I see that; I have felt that. Temptation is a thing, isn’t it?
The way out of that temptation is to recognize the feeling driving your need to eat to soothe yourself – feelings ignored get us in all kinds of trouble, don’t they? So recognize it. When you feel seen, what does it do for you? For me, it validates. “Ah, they see me. They get it.” Interesting how that usually changes my perspective, which makes it easier to make a better choice.
So in that moment, when you’re struggling, know that I see you. You’re not alone. I know that impulse, that need for what HAS worked for you when you didn’t feel like you had other choices. And I see your desire for something different, yes? You wouldn’t be here, wouldn’t have spent so much time, money, and effort in the past if you didn’t want something different.
Stepping toward something different. How do we do that?
Reconnect with your purpose, your why. Remember why you’re choosing to do something different this time. Maybe your reasons are similar to many of my clients who’ve said they’re doing it for: Health, a smaller size, mobility, avoiding Type 2 Diabetes, to just feel better, to live longer, to feel like yourself again, to conquer this — this one thing you haven’t been able to do when you’ve done so many other things. One lady said she wanted to save herself the indignity of signing up for another round of that famous group that works for a while, but it has never met the true, deeper need.
Recognize what you truly want. Do you truly want this tempting thing? Or do you truly want your goal?
Yes, sometimes both, and it can be messy and complicated. There’s all my “stuff” going on, and whatshisname is being difficult, and that circumstance is just too hard, and I’m just really stressed right now!!!! I can’t find the feeling or figure out what else I need, I just need comfort!!
That happens, too, doesn’t it?
Okay. Then you have it – with this caveat: please take the time to enjoy it.
If you don’t allow yourself to enjoy it, what was the point? If you swallow it quickly rather than enjoying every taste, squeezing all the flavor out of it, then did you enjoy it? Was it worth it? Will it be worth it tomorrow?
Put it on a plate, use a fork or spoon, sit down at your table, and take the time to enjoy the experience. I know this feels counter-intuitive, and it may set you off, but we’re still creating a habit here, and changing the habit of a lifetime – like soothing yourself with food – does take some time and effort. And note: It will not help you if you then heap shame and guilt on yourself. Give yourself a little grace. Have the food, let all the feelings settle, then dust yourself off and get back on your plan. Start again.
If this resonates with you, let’s have a chat, or look at my courses or book. You don’t have to be stuck.