SECRET to Weight Loss and Goal Maintenance

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What is really stopping you from reaching and maintaining your goal?

We’re all different, but there is a common thread for many who struggle with weight loss and maintenance.  I say this over and over to my clients.  Here’s the secret:  Believe that your needs matter.

What’s your initial reaction to that? 

Some of you are clear on that, and many of you just got tears in your eyes.  It’s such a common thing for good-hearted people to sacrifice to take care of others, yet when we make that our lifestyle, always sacrificing and only giving our needs crumbs of leftovers, it has significant side effects.  Weight gain, emotional eating, exhaustion, poor health, and losing our sense of value are common.  The worst of it is that we beat ourselves up for those side effects and plaster guilt on ourselves for having no self-control or discipline. 

It’s not a lack of self-control or discipline – it’s exhausting the resource. 

Just like willpower is a diminishing resource, giving and giving and giving without replenishing robs us of the energy and clarity to make good choices.  We need SOMETHING in that moment, and a Twinkie will do.  Side effects.   

Your needs MATTER.

We often prioritize the needs of our children, aging parents, organizations where we serve or volunteer, and our jobs, gradually but consistently neglecting our own.  It may be noble, but it costs us.  

In practical terms, think about when something happens with work, and you miss lunch and then you go check on your kids or aging parents, and you’re really late getting home.  We can stand the gnawing hunger for so long, but then?  Grab anything available – whether we really like it or not. That’s not a lack of self-control – it’s the body’s drive to sustain us.  Yet we blame or shame ourselves. 

With other needs, like our hearts, bodies, minds, emotions, it’s different.   Instead of feeding it, we deaden that part of us.  It doesn’t matter.  We can manage – it will be fine.  And it’s not, so we reach for our soother of choice just to get something for us – comfort food, shopping, television, alcohol.   Give me just a moment to feel better! It soothes, but it does not restore. 

Okay, Renée, but how do we fix that? 

Believe YOUR NEEDS MATTER and meet them.   That will require some healing of your heart.  We have so much going on in there, and some of it isn’t helpful.  Believe me – I had a LOT to unpack and heal.  When we no longer eat to soothe ourselves, we save so many calories.

I know, it’s not the easy answer, but it is the one that will change your life.

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