Socrates said, “The secret of change is to focus all of your energy, not on fighting the old, but on building the new.”
Yet what do we most often do but fight the old by focusing on what we do not want – like cake or procrastinating or that habit you’re trying to break or red cats.
What are you thinking about?
That habit, cake, or the red cat with his little red hat on a red bicycle. Isn’t it weird that immediately that’s all we can think about? The more you think about not thinking about it, the more elaborate the image grows – putting it front and center in your mind and keeping it there. It’s no wonder we can’t get rid of the thought!
If you’ve followed me a while, you know about my craving for peanut butter that I worked to overcome. What you may NOT know if you’ve not seen me in person is that I have struggled with biting my nails for decades. It was a nervous habit that served a purpose when it was created, but it’s long been a nuisance. I know how hard it is to make these changes.
Breaking free of a craving or a habit requires doing what it takes to focus on what you do want. Whether it’s weight loss, procrastination, nail-biting, or any other habit you want to break, much of the work comes down to motivation, tenacity, and focus. What is it that you do want? Make that vision bold and bright in your mind. It can outshine the other thing soon enough if you make what you want the more vivid image.
It works toward the positive as well. If you want to change a mindset that will help you be more positive, work effectively, speak to people you don’t yet know, and other measures of success, visualize yourself doing that. Make it vivid and IMAX size. See yourself being the engaging and confident person you want to be with the healthy body you desire.
See what I mean? Feel it?
Keep that in focus. I struggled for decades with the Diet Yo-Yo and another with nail-biting. Shifting focus, sorting out what was driving the behaviors, and some good visualization broke both. Focus on what you want.
If you need some help figuring that out or support while you do, let’s talk: [email protected]
